"It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining an egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad. "
C.S. Lewis
Round Two for our car....not sure if she will survive. There is much more damage to the car and engine this time. I am grateful that Rob is okay, aside from some whiplash and minor injuries. I am also glad he wasn't at fault. It really could have been a lot worse especially since the airbags didn't deploy when they should have. A major malfunction that could have cost us big time.
I've been thinking about deleting my Facebook. I could give a long list of reasons why but mainly it's because I don't like having my feelings hurt or feeling left out every time I get on(sounds lame, I know). I just feel like people live their lives on Facebook and post everything and I feel like I would be happier not knowing. You can't feel bad or feel left out if you don't know what is going on right? Maybe I could just delete some people? But that could cause more problems than I want to deal with. Rob and I sometimes talk about moving to another country or state again to get away from everything here. I am seriously considering it. It was really nice when we lived outside of Utah County. Don't get me wrong, there have been a lot of great people in our lives here and I love them tons and would seriously miss them. AND then there have been some people who should be more involved in our lives that have no idea what is going on. It's a two way street, I realize this but sometimes it sucks to be the different one....to be the odd man/couple out. Anyway, this is why I haven't been posting as much. It's kind of silly to find out things on a blog or facebook when we live so close, right? There are tons of things I could write about....Like our two car wrecks within a two month span, things breaking in the house, our cute puppies and the things they can do now, my photography course and some of the really great pictures I have taken , my fertility issues, my serious shoulder injury, our awesome softball teams, raises/promotions at work, new callings in church, eye surgery, or Rob's school and the opportunities he has encountered....but right now I figured the involved people already know most of this. I'm sure there will be some talk, oh well. I write this because I need to get it off my chest, not to hurt anyone. I want to just send it out into the endless black hole of the internet so it will go away and never come back. So my questions is this, where to go? Rob has only a little bit of school left (yes! I can't wait) and the anticipation of change is just nagging at me. We already have the plans to sell our home and after that we are free to go where ever we want. Hey, we may stay in Utah (maybe I am in a funk or I'll decide that those things don't bother me as much anymore...or I just be grateful for the involved ones in my life). Does anyone know any great opportunities for us?
6 comments:
Jen, please come here to AZ.. it's super awesome here.. barely any drama..we seriously have great friends and although the summers are quite hot, but so is Utah in the summer.. and in the winter.. it's perfect!! you guys would totally fit here, I just know it!
Move to Cedar :) It's perfect: far enough that you can do your own thing, but you can also go home when there's something important going on. You like the outdoors and you've got Zion right around the corner! You've already lived in St. George though right? Maybe it's just back into another "trap" with the same thing going on.. I'm still trying to decide what I want to do when Rich gets back. I think it just depends on job stuff. See where the two of you can get a job then just go... that could be an adventure :) This is becoming a really long comment, sorry.. ha ha. And sorry that I'm not more involved in your life/you in mine. I could give a million excuses why, but really it doesn't matter. We're family and it's kinda ridiculous that half of that stuff you listed I had no clue about.. I'll try to be a better sister-in-law. Hope things work out good for the two of you in whatever you end up doing!
I really want to be involved. I feel like these comments were directed at me, and for that I am sorry. I love you and I hope you know that. I say delete Facebook, that is what I need to do, mostly because I am not on there ever. I am a little old fashioned, I like to talk to people in person or on the phone. The problem is that the phone seems to be obsolete these days, no one answers my calls. Maybe I am the one who is obsolete, and no one wants to talk to me! :) Love you.
i don't really know what to say to you, other than i'm sorry you're in a slump..i hate feeling like that and like you i hate the whole social networking thing..i could care less if 50 people tell me happy birthday on fb, just cause fb told them it was my bday and they wouldn't have otherwise known or cared what was going on in my life. i hope you can find your right adventure, a place that you can both find jobs and a place that makes you happy. sometimes getting away and completely alone is the best thing to do.
I agree that many of my UT relationships end up hurting my feelings. Every time I'm in town, none of my friends even answer or return my calls. If I do happen to make plans with them, they end up canceling last minute or not showing up at all. I've learned to just stop worrying about it and spend time with people who want to spend time with me, like my mommy and my sister. Everyone else isn't worth my stress or frustration.
I think the funk thing is a summer of 2010 thing. My family has been in one, and alot of my friends have been too. You are not alone! I keep saying that I cant wait for this crap hole year to end!!! But I agree with Tiecen stick by your family, and the friends that matter!! To hell with the rest! Hang in there!!!
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